Luke 14:26-27 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.”
Jesus’ words in these two verses can seem quite shocking to today’s ears. You certainly won’t hear words like that from many preachers and evangelists today. Far too often, following Jesus is made to look like it’s “foot loose and fancy free”. Pray your “sinner’s prayer” and, presto, all your problems are over. Your ticket to eternal life is punched. Counting the costs of discipleship is rarely emphasized today. Yet, Jesus never allowed anyone to harbor the delusion that following him was easy. If we are to follow Jesus, we must be all in. If we are not all in, he makes clear that we are not in at all. Following Jesus is not a periodic endeavor. We do not follow him on our terms, or when it is convenient for us. We follow him on his terms, counting whatever costs may be necessary. The nuts and bolts of what Jesus is saying are this: He demands total, unwavering devotion. Our love for him must be greater than our love for even our closest human relationships. The division and discord Jesus brings can invade even the family circle. In the place where we expect to find love and loyalty, we may well face opposition instead. It is at this point that many begin to waver in their devotion to Jesus: when it creeps within the confines of the family. Then the cracks in their armor show through. Sacred Scripture is clear about the importance of family, and Jesus is not saying that we are to suddenly despise and abhor our parents when we become his disciples. Remember the 5th Commandment? “Honor your father and your mother…” Jesus is not saying that we are to suddenly despise and abhor our siblings and our children when we become his disciples. Scripture is clear about the responsibility parents are to have in raising their children in the nurture and instruction of the Lord (e. g. Deut. 6:4-7; Ps. 127:3; Eph. 6:4; Col. 3:21). But our utmost allegiance to him may cause great conflict with the ones we love the most. We may be rejected by our own family for following Jesus. Jesus demands that he must be our unqualified first love. Jesus’ declaration is a somber declaration, but it is really nothing more than the 1st Commandment expressed in different words. “You shall have no other gods before me.” No one but God can rightly claim this degree of loyalty, but Jesus is God Incarnate. As such, we must make him preeminent in our lives if we expect to follow him. If not, he says we “cannot be (his) disciple.” He refuses to be a mere footnote to our lives.
Jesus goes on to say, “Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.” Jesus used this imagery of bearing one’s cross previously in Luke 9:23. “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me” (see also Matt. 16:24; Mark 8:34). The concept of taking up one’s cross has been greatly watered down in modern culture. People tritely say, “That’s just my cross to bear.” It is used to refer to enduring the mild inconveniences or the minor trials and setbacks that occur in life, like a leaky roof, a transmission job, or a month-long visit from a demanding friend or relative. People wear crosses around their necks as a fashion statement. But Jesus’ original hearers would have immediately understood exactly what Jesus meant. For Jesus’ original hearers, the cross had a singular meaning: death. The sight of a condemned man carrying the crossbeam of the cross upon which he would be executed was a common sight in first century Israel. Such a man was on a one way trip. He wasn’t coming back. Jesus is pointing to the highest order of self-denial and self-sacrifice. There is a cross for every disciple. Discipleship may take us down a road we would not pick for ourselves, but it is a road we must be willing to travel if Jesus calls us to do so. Jesus’ followers must be willing to identify with him. And they must be willing to do so publicly. They must be willing to suffer with him if they wish to be glorified with him (Rom. 8:17). Jesus’ own life is a model for his followers. Suffering precedes glory.
The cross that Jesus calls his disciples to bear is a contradiction to human wisdom and basic human instinct. We are comfort seekers by nature. Yet, this is the demand Jesus makes of all of his disciples. Discipleship may take us down a road we would not pick for ourselves, but it is a road we must be willing to travel if Jesus calls us to do so. If we are not, he says we cannot be his disciple. Cross bearing is the essence of discipleship. Jesus is asking: “Do you really want to follow me?” “Are you really willing to count the costs and bear your cross?” “Are you really willing to go where I send you and do what I call you to do?” Is following Jesus, on his terms, worth it to you? He does not take us on our terms; we take him on his… or not at all. Jesus is saying: “Sit down and consider if you really want to follow me because it is not an easy road.” The road of discipleship is not an easy road, but it is the only road that leads to the kingdom of God. Jesus is not trying to drive prospective followers away. He wants them to seriously evaluate the costs.
Being a Christian today has been so watered down with “easy believism.” It’s presented as a utopian magic-carpet ride that provides health, wealth, and “your best life now.” It’s more about massaging people’s egos than preaching the hard truth of the Christian life. Being a Christian does not mean you will automatically be sick, poor, and miserable. In fact, it should mean anything but that. We should be the most joy-filled people in a joyless, cold, and evil world. But Jesus made it clear that storms will enter every life. There is something paradoxical about the Christian life. On the one hand, can anything bring joy and true, lasting peace more than being a follower of Jesus? On the other hand, there are also costs, sometimes heavy costs to pay. No one was clearer about that than Jesus. But count the value of what we receive in return if we are willing to count those costs. The kingdom of God is so valuable that it is worth sacrificing anything and everything in order to gain it. Those who are citizens of the kingdom of God must be devoted to Jesus. They must be willing to part with anything if priority to the kingdom calls for it. They must be willing to part with everything if priority to Jesus calls for it. In short, Jesus comes first. He must be first and preeminent in our lives. The problem is that many professed Christians only want a little bit of Jesus as an add-on to the rest of their lives. They want Jesus to solve all their problems, but we do not want him to change their hearts.
There’s no question that the only message Jesus ever proclaimed was a message of discipleship. He never issued a plea to make some kind of momentary decision to acquire forgiveness and a ticket to heaven, and then go on living anyway you want. For many, following Jesus is nothing more than an emotional decision that quickly fades away when conflict comes. For others, they are preoccupied with many, many other things that come before Jesus. And they will all face tragic consequences in the end (Matt. 7:21-23). Jesus wants us to examine ourselves. He’s asking us: “Do you really want to follow me?” “Are you really willing to count the costs and bear your cross?” We must follow Jesus on his terms, not ours. We must be willing to go where he calls us to go, and we must be willing to do what he calls us to do. That is the cost of discipleship. Discipleship is not easy.